Insider Information & Loop Holes

Here's some more insider information for all you governmental ignoramouses like myself - in my past governmental ingoramal bliss.

First, it is a 60 day session and there are like 2,000 bills that get introduced during that period - not counting the memorials and such - and for a bill to get passed it must get through whatever committees it's assigned to and then through the Senate, where they'll have a 1-3 hour debate over it, then through the House committees, then through more debate on the House floor - and then it must be signed by the governor! So, I would say about 300-400 bills actually make it - if that! You might ask, then why do so many bills get introduced? - To keep the people happy, that's why. Even if there's no chance a bill will make it through the long journey, at least a senator can say they tried.

Next, did you know that the senate majority floor leader can roll the clock - in other words it doesn't matter what time it is, he can say, "Madam President, seeing that it is now 11:59 am I move that we adjurn until 12:01 pm." Then it instantly turns into 12:01 pm and they can move on to the next day's agenda. You can get through days in just a few hours! It's magic!

Also, there is a deadline about half way through the session after which you can't introduce any new bills. That's when committee leaders and such introduce "dummy bills" - or as I like to call them "blank check bills". These bills are labelled as "Public peace, health, safety & welfare", which can be changed into anything they want. So you see, even though the deadline has passed to introduce new legislation, a senator can simply change these "dummy bills" into whatever they want whenever they want. Loop hole! Cha-ching!

I'm sure I'll learn about more secret strategies as I continue working here at the capitol of governmental knowledge and doings. And you can check in as I relay that information to you.

What it Takes

I've been working at the Capitol now for about six weeks. I came into this position with uncertainty and confusion. But now I have learned how most of the operation works.

First, anyone can run for public office if they have enough money. It takes a couple hundred thousand to run for a Senate position. It takes a few million to run for the governor position.

When asked one day if I would ever run for office I replied, "Well, I don't know that I would be very qualified." That same afternoon I was delivering a paper to a "senator" on the floor and observed this "senator" shopping online for skirts. Now that you know this "senator" is a woman, you can probably quess who it was. What a disgrace! I was amazed that this "senator" would have that kind of ignorance - to think that she could get away with shopping online in front of everyone! I'm sure the guests sitting in the gallery could see her!

So, I no longer look at the position of senator as a high and mighty position. And - if "ice man" can run for gov then anyone can - as long as you are famous that is.

I'm backkkkkk!!!!!!

Okay, I'm back on the blog scene. I never realized how much drama there is in politics. These guys are mad at the governor and the governor wants people to think he's tough, so he says he's gonna be against those guys, and then the other guys have to side with the first guys even though they are a different party, because they both don't like the governor.

As Sen MJ Garcia would say: Let's just all get along and support eachother's bills!

Speaking of bills, I need to watch that old school house rock cartoon about how bills get passed because it is still kind of a mystery to me.

Speaking of mysteries, I am so excited to watch Lost tonight! Man! I wonder what new mystery will come up tonight!

Speaking of Lost, why would they make a building round like this, I get so lost. Sometimes I just walk circles around this place because I feel like I'm on that space ship from that movie with the monkies. You know, the one from like the 1980s.

Speaking of the 1980s, yesterday I modelled a wedding dress from the 1890s! It was so old and smelled like death, but it was a fun experience. It was for Hispanic Heritage day. The Sociedad Folklorika. If that doesn't sound hispanic I don't know what does.

Speaking of Hispanic, I am looking forward to making tacos for dinner tonight, with guacamole and salsa and cheeeps!

Speaking of guacamole, my fiance looks very handsome today in his green shirt. He hasn't worn that shirt in a while and I think it is a fine color on him.

Speaking of him, I enjoy working with my fiance just down the hall because after having a long distance relationship for two years it's nice to be able to take a 60 second walk to visit your loved one.

Speaking of loved one, my puppy is so cute and I am sad that I am missing her adorable tiny baby years. These are the years when she develops a personality of her own and is an all around little stinker!

Speaking of stinkers, my fiance started crying this morning because I kindly asked him to pick two dirty nasty cans off the beautifully new and exquisite furniture that I purchsed for him recently.

Speaking of exquisite.... I'm tired. Bye.

Nelson Visits the Roundhouse!

Today my grandmother, Elsie, is visiting the state captiol for "Senior Day!" Also, I ran into my high school history teacher from SPX, Mr. Hartzel. What an exciting day. Got to put my computer skills to work helping Stuart connect to the internet. Some days at the Capitol are alright.

My First Blog!

Hi. This is my first blog post. Yeah!